DON'T LISTEN TO A WORD I SAY!

Adventure #76 Order a Big Meal To Fill You For a Lifetime!

"I would like to order this, with a side of this, minus that, add that but take out this!" Sound Familiar? We are talking about dinner out right? You know those people; maybe you are one of them. You like that certain mouth-watering item but suddenly you change your mind.. Everything is halted and then it's time to order! "I will have your famous Cobb Salad minus the chicken.. you can add the bacon but only crispy please... egg whites chopped and dressing on the side right?" (should you be writing this down)? You get your meal and because you ordered it exactly how you commanded it, you are suddenly surprised it didn't all come out the way you planned it..... 

I sit here. In Bed as usual. The clock ticks. I went to bed at 12 and between Instagram, Chicago Sports News and Brutus's Snoring; Its Suddenly 2 am. I have officially used Brutus as My New IHOME Docking Station. He is laid out on his back, flaps flopping and has become the primary holder of all the technical portals at my disposal. He has an IPOD, and IPHONE and a Cordless IMOUSE on his chest. He doesn't seem to mind, he's been out for hours. I wish I could say the same. So.... My Question Tonight Is:

Do You Think Relationships are a minus this or an add that? Cause Looking around the last ten years or so, I feel that You Can Honestly... Just Take It Or You Leave It! I look at some of my friends, and I feel like they really wanted the Perfect Cobb Salad but the settled for a side dinner salad instead. To Each as Own as the all say. And Then I get Down On Myself For still being single, married-less, not-engaged ever, non-prego and wondering...

Do I Want TO Settle For Whats on The Menu? Or Do I Wait Around For a New Restaurant to Open?

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>THIS SONG HAS BEEN ON MY SPOTIFY ENTITLED:
 "CLUELESS DONUTS" FOR THREE MONTHS!!! CHECK IT OUT BELOW<<<<<<<<<<<<

Little Talks - Of Monsters And Men VIDEO (Lyrics in description)

Smashed Baby Bliss?

Adventure #75 Forgetful Silliness

Brutus has a way a getting on to the bed. He sneaks and circles kinda like a shark does; slowly and patiently waiting to attack. When he pounces and finds his way, to his surprise there is another foreign object laying next to Mommy. Over the last now two and half years, this bed has been empty. As I have said before, I have barely slept in it. My long nights of Chinese and re runs on the couch have come to a close and finally I let someone real in. So, what now? Its been a month and I feel like I am on the verge of another guy telling me He's not good enough for me. So, what's so great about me? I forget to clean the toilet rings, pick up dirty laundry and have been even so lazy that getting up and filling Brutus's dog bowl feels like a climb up Mount Fuji! I also forget to throw out spoil milk, I barely buy groceries and I am pretty sure my gas tank is empty right now. So, I am left with questions and I am not sure if anyone out there can answer any of them? Here's three... Can somebody help me? Things are starting to get silly.

1. What is the point of all of this?
2. Why do we feel not complete being alone?
3. Is there anyway Brutus can wipe his butt.. cause I am pretty sure he left a foreign object hanging?

Song Below To My Surprise Has Now Come Out on The Terrible Thing We Call Top 40! I Knew It A Year Ago....:)

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ?

Alex Clare - Too Close (OFFICIAL VIDEO)

If You Lived Here. You Would Be Annoyed By Now!

Adventure #74 Extra Baggage?

>>>>>>>>>For Rent! Two Bed, One Bath, Old Florida Style House! Enjoy this and more with echo-filled walls and a non-draining bath tub!  Immediate Special Move In Rate! In Search of New tenant that will aid help and relief from English Bulldog!<<<<<<


 The person that lives here is on the brink of a plummeting off the Sunshine Sky Way Bridge if shit doesn't get in check! Being Single for as long as I Have, you develop some patterns that seem to go unnoticed when living by yourself. However, when someone new enters your comfortable surroundings things find a way of getting very aggravating. Picture A Long Day At Work followed by An Amazing Fajita Filled Dinner and a Movie on a Friends Couch. The New Prospect is Cuddled up around you and your belly and your attitude about things are finally complete. Though, between sips of my wine and the cute smiles from the new guy, you hear tiny shreds of glass breaking through the lanai. It's a burden and annoying. It resembles a screeching baby on an airplane, when not one part of you is Maternal. Or a Jitter Caffeine Filled Kid in line at the grocery store. YOUR HUNGOVER and  the kid is running into the magazine rack and with his gummy filled finger tips is TOUCHING EVERYTHING! Including Your Cart! And Then There is Worse. There is Brutus. After Just twenty minutes of the movie, we head home into what should be a relaxing downplay of the night. This quickly turns into a terror of getting up and out of bed multiple times to organize a new strategy of calming the beast. I tried the crate with a bone, I tried the bathroom with a blanket, I tried the leashed tied to the table with the water, blanket and a toy. And then we (mine to date favorite maneuver) of relocating my dresser wedged as a barrier to the entrance of my bedroom. The beast is stirring, and between slams and whines underneath the bedroom door crack, the new guy makes known that now we are the ones locked up. We are caged in my own house, and getting a drink of water seems like a task for the Marine core! Things finally calm down in about an hour and lets just say my patience isn't the only thing being put to rest tonight. The New Guy Is More Irritated then I can imagine and I am just taking in the irony of the whole thing.  Brutus Imagined it was always just gonna be me and him.... If I Don't get this crap picked up, he just might be right!

Run Away Egg Sand Which

Adventure #73 A Breakfast Of Champions?

Just finished the weekend with my best of friends, cocktails, keg stands and a shark watermelon. A month ago, I envision this weekend umm just slightly different. How so? Well, I never conceived making breakfast for "a sorta, kinda x," and "a fun easy breezy new guy." Yep, Picture this: Freshly showered and reclaiming our stubble steps from the night before;  a slightly tired birthday boy comes rolling up into the kitchen. Me, being the nice "let's take the high road" invited him into a breakfast sandwich and some slight awkwardness. There sits the shirtless new guy and the hairy surfer dude side-by-side. I am crouched behind the fridge as I lock eyes with my best friend and realize HOLY CRAP WE ARE ACTUALLY DOING THIS!?? If neither of them realized who each other was.. I guess we are in luck.. But how could at least one of them not? Tracing my steps from the night before of hand-holding, soft kisses and some ass grabbing... the hairy one is absolutely stoned and clueless to the fact that I did exactly what I said I was gonna do. "I'm Moving On!" So, I played nice and crept a steep mountain of amenity, smiled and moved forward. Guys are different. They don't talk shit about each other shoes, outfits or hairstyles. For all I know, neither of them was even thinking about me! Though, if I were to ever my own restaurant one day, I would call this menu item: 1 egg with a side of X. I don't know how many of you have seen Sex in the City? But I will refer to one episode when Miranda is glowing about her new relationship with the handsome Doctor Robert. She feels a little guilty that Steve is still a bit of a bum and single. The girls are all at breakfast, when Samantha says very pointedly: "YOU WON!" Minus the Sex and the Bloody Tampon Nose, I guess that solves the problem how they are all gonna meet! I now can check that off my list! If its not a competition... then we can just call it:
NO CONTEST!

 >>>>>>CHECK OUT THE SEX IN THE CITY SCENE LINK BELOW<<<<<<<<

Sex and the City: Miranda & Robert/Steve Season 6

Wide Awake Wake Up Call

Adventure # 72 Just One Of Them Days...

Letting Go Is Something I am certainly not known for and A lot can happen in a week. A lot can happen in 5 mins. Over the last few days, I have discovered that nothing is certain. Instead of complaining about the vices, miss steps and poop piles.... I am just gonna breathe. It took me a long time to let everything go, accept what cards I was dealt and picked up the pieces. Bru has been a true happiness in my life and I really can't take anything back... I think its best sometimes to just go with the flow and STOP ANALYZING EVERYTHING! A friend a long time ago told me never let anyone live in your head Rent Free! I love that saying, but hardly ever obey by it. I went out on The 4th Of July Very apprehensive as to what to expect. Some people (mostly couples) would argue with me that 4th of July is Not a "Couple Kind of Holiday." Sorry, but I beg to differ. Name one Holiday that really isn't? Here is what I pictured: 3 sets of couples, all holding hands, the famous ahh lets lean on my boyfriend's chest and take in all the oooohhhhhsss and ahhhhhhhhhhhhs. Then there's me and my wet, anxious meat muscle adorned with glow sticks, some Miller Lights and the feeling of vulnerability, that comes from a mid summer wish that just didn't happen.  And Here's What Happened: Noticed a Guy's Back Of All Things, smiled and went on my merry way. Ended up running into his back a few bars down the road and proceeded to flirt my freaking face off in hopes of finding my own little firecracker! LOL Well.. Something Clicked so We Proceeded On Our Own Little Adventure for the next 36 hours. Countless Smiles, Bars, Friends, Exercise Challenges, Sushi Rolls and Crazy Scenarios came about in the following days... One Being Kicked out of a Popular Pool in Town, breaking a glass window to get into my house, a complete Brutus Dominance Challenge and Yelling at 2 Pig Face Rent-A-Cops where just a few highlights of the weekend. Though for some reason, even with all this crazy chaos... we were both able to even each other out! For Some reason, I am actually just going with it. Not Gonna Analyze, not gonna Question and I am gonna be quiet... Hell I Shouldn't Even Being Bloging about This??? Copy, Paste, Print, Delete or Save For Later?

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>song below is totally an inside joke<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
                                                               so classic!

Don't take it personal(just one of them days)-Monica